Reflecting on 1-Year of Living in Korea
It’s officially been 1 year since I left the USA to live in Seoul, Korea unemployed. For someone who has always been a typical Type A overachiever, this is a huge departure from everything I’ve done my entire life. I’ve always followed “The Track” only to realize that “The Track” that I was promised straight up doesn’t exist anymore. So here are my thoughts and reflections on 1 year of living in Korea:
Living abroad is full of the highest highs and the lowest lows. They balance each other out but the pendulum can swing so quickly. I knew living here would be really hard and it is, but it is also wonderful and amazing in ways I could never have predicted or imagined.
Universal healthcare should be a right. I sprained my ankle within a few weeks of being here and was devastated at the idea of going to the hospital. I wound up at an orthopedic clinic and a doctor’s examination, some X-Rays, a boot and crutches cost me a whopping … 180,000 KRW ~ $120 USD. And that was completely uninsured cash price. It’s been so eye opening to live in a place where people don’t make decisions about their health based on whether they can afford it or not.
Nobody really cares what you’re doing. I was really nervous to tell people that I was quitting my cushy tech job to live abroad and it turns out that most people don’t really care what you’re up to! Of course family and friends were sad that we were leaving the states and that they wouldn’t see us as often, but beyond that just know that a lot of the worries we create in our head are just that - in our head.
Language learning later in life is hard. I underestimated being in my late 20s in intensive Korean classes. Most of my classmates are significantly younger - like 20 or 21 and seeing the way that they can hear a word once and remember it, or learn a new grammar pattern and immediately use it can get frustrating. Your brain slows down as you age and even in my late 20s I can feel the difference from when I was in college.
Friends come and go. A lot of people immigrate to Korea, but very few stay long term. As a result, it’s hard constantly making new friends only to have them leave and then repeating the whole process again. The upside is we now have a lot of very cool friends all over the world.
Your job shouldn’t be your identity. I knew this one would be hard to decouple myself from but it was surprisingly easier than I thought it would be. After a few months of not working I had someone turn to me (in the USA) and say “Sorry I didn’t catch it earlier, but what do you do?” and I looked at them with a blank stare for a few seconds while I wondered what that question could possibly mean only to realize that they were asking what I do for work! Then I had to tell them I quit my job in tech and am unemployed while we live abroad.
Being biracial is still hard in Korea. I don’t know what I expected of one of the most homogeneous societies on the planet, but I have (kinda) come to terms with the fact that I’ll never be Korean and (some people) will never accept me as American enough. It’s both incredibly special to be both and also lonely at the same time. I resonate with what a lot of Korean Americans talk about except that I don’t look Korean and I don’t look White so I’ll always be regarded with some level of “foreignness” no matter where I am.
I LOVE not owning a car. I can’t rave about this enough but we have a monthly public transit card that gets us unlimited bus, subway and bicycle rentals for a flat fee that comes out to around $38 USD per month. I don’t ever think about parking! Or who is going to be our designated driver! And don’t get me started on all the car maintenance! No more insurance, oil changes, tire rotations, windshield wiper fluid replacement, car washes, and more. I haven’t taken a taxi in over 6 months because the public transit isn’t just convenient, it’s literally faster than taking a car (no traffic on the subway) and did I say unlimited rides?!
Little things feels like huge wins. For example, for our latest move I was able to set up the internet in our new house all by myself! Navigating the app, inputting all of the information, and talking to the agent on the phone to schedule the install was all in Korean and I felt over the moon for days about that. Okay, I still do!
Nobody is telling you what to do or how to live, you have to figure that out for yourself. It’s really easy when you’re on a Track to have the momentum pushing you in a direction. You have a routine that usually doesn’t change much day-to-day or week-to-week. Once you step off that track and you have literally no time to be awake by, or any place to go, you have to figure it all out for yourself. It can be terrifying looking ahead at your days, weeks, months, only to have nothing there. But the exciting part is realizing that you get to decide what goes there instead of the Track putting you on a path.
Basically, I am really darn proud of myself for doing this and for where I am right now. This has been the most unexpected journey of my 20s and I am so grateful that I have been able to do this. I have learned so much more Korean, gotten really close to my family here, reconnected with my identity in a way I never could have imagined, made countless friends, and eaten soooo soooo much good Korean food.
Living abroad is hard but amazing and I am feeling so lucky to be writing this on a snowy day in Seoul. Until next time!